Roan

I’m 13 and have recently been noticing more and more requests from my mom to be more girly. She doesn’t say that directly, but she says that she likes it when I wear earrings and other jewelry, pink, and dresses etc… I normally answer very bluntly with a fake oblivious tone and an “I don’t really like those things.”
I don’t seriously mind wearing the occasional necklace, and I willingly got my ears pierced when I was really young and going through THAT phase, *shudders*, but I do have a problem with dresses and certain earrings when it becomes impractical. I also hate the color pink. Aside from when I was 9, I have always been very much a tomboy, asking to do “concussion ball” as my parents called it, (we compromised on flag football,) begging for a skateboard, having mud ball fights with my younger brother, and the list goes on.
Knowing this, for my birthday this year, my mom got me a pair of dangling fairy earrings and three perfumes. Also, for the James Bond themed New Year’s Eve party that we went to, she insisted that I should be a Bond GIRL, no matter how much I’ve always wanted to wear a tuxedo.
I’m getting increasingly angry at her, but I feel bad for her at the same time. I suppose if I was a girly mom I would want my daughter to be girly too so we could have shared interests in clothes shopping and nail painting, but seeing as I’m my own person and not her doll, she needs to move on and accept that she isn’t going to change me.
I’m pretty certain that I’m not transgender and I think I’m probably not non gender binary, ( but honestly I don’t care because it doesn’t change who I am at all,) but I fit in more with the societal stereotypes of a boy than a girl.
I guess my point of this is that, for every tomboy, you should be whoever you want to be no matter how disappointing it might be for your parents, and for all the disappointed parents of tomboys, you have to learn that they are their own person.

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Blue

So I’m 13. I have a twin brother and an older brother by 6 years. When I was really young I used to be super girly and dress and act like a total girly girl. I slowly started acting more tomboyish around the third grade. Wearing boys clothes and my mom didn’t really care. But as its getting more advanced she keeps complaining about it. So no I’m like basket ball shorts and really baggy shirts 24/7. She’s told me before that I was a disgrace to women. She’ll ask if I’m lesbian or trying to be a man because of my clothes. I don’t act like a girly girl either and she’ll try and guilt trip me by saying she misses the girly girl she once had. She says the way I’m dressing is hurting me even though it’s really not. Even when I say I’m not a lesbian she keeps asking and expresses her disappointment if a I am. She says it would be okay if I wrote men’s clothing but made an effort to actually look like a girl. Overall it’s really annoying and iterating and I’m scared if I confide in her in anything she won’t support me or she’ll just judge me.

Anonymous

Hi, I’m 13, a tomboy, and proud of it. Since I was a toddler, I wear practical clothes, have boys as friends and love sports, science and gaming. I realised I was a tomboy at 7 years old, when I was playing with my cousin and refused to act as a princess, which was the very first time I was called a tomboy. I hate makeup and ‘girly’ clothes, and only wear dresses on VERY formal occasions. My friends (most of which are guys) accept me as a tomboy, but a couple of people have talked to me like its a bad thing. My mum didn’t like it at first, thought it was a ‘phase’ and tried to buy me ‘girly’ things that I, to be completely honest, hated. I reasoned with her and helped her realise that being a tomboy is a unique virtue, not something to be ashamed of. My overall message is that you shouldn’t let people change who you are, no matter who they are.

Anonymous

Hello everyone i’ve been a tomboy since i was just about in the 5th grade. Kids would bully me for that, so i told my mom and then she told the teachers and it’s like ever since anybody wanted to talk with me. Maybe i’m going to be a tomboy for the rest of my life. And it’s been about almost 4 years since i’ve been a tomboy for your information. So you should just keep yourself confident if anybody and i mean anybody shuts you down. You just make them feel bad because they probably just don’t like you.

Shruti

Heyyy!!!guys I am now 16 .You know I like to be my realself . When I was kid my mother used to buy clothes for me in which I look terrible many times when I buy forks,skirts,tops . in my childhood I was totally surrounded by Girlish thing . but as I grown up I start knowing myself I started understanding myself .my clothing style totally changed I love joggers,shirts and when I ask my parents to buy for me so they think that ‘our girl is no more in our hands ‘WRONG!!! I never liked myself being a girl I wear such kind. Of clothes because I feel comfortable there is no means of being a boy just I feel comfortable I never feel comfortable in Girlish thing .2 months before I cut my hair short people treat me like I have no means of leaving in this world .my parents just afraid of this society I never give a s** to this society all I want to tell that live your life and let me be and u r no one to interfere in my life

Lucy

I don’t have any stories as bad as other people but there are a threw things that I hate but I don’t dress like a boy or have the haircut of a boy ,,I just dress the way I want to.I hate not being able to go to the toilet or changing room with out people staring or pointing it out.I’m not stupid!I know my gender.
I think that since I have the experience of being called a boy and so treated differently I am more sensitive to gender inequality so…I hate it when I point it out then I get shouted at for “creating such disruption!”
I like it though that I look tougher and that it’s a good conversation starter.
I have met so many people from it.

Anonymous

I was always a tomboy as a child and in school I made friends with everyone,boys and girls.I’m still friends with some of them to this day.As I grew up I went a bit girly just to fit in but I’ve grown maturer and found my style.I dress different to the girls and feel best when hanging with the guys.I’m trying to figure out my sexuality too,I think I might be bisexual just because of mixing with boys who talk about girls a lot.

Rose

I’ve been a tomboy since I was 3. I started at playgroup at that age and made friends mainly with boys. I decided that I hated pink and red, began wearing exclusively boy’s clothes (including underwear/swimwear), and had a short haircut. My mum is a tomboy and totally got it so always let me do whatever made me comfortable, which I am incredibly thankful for. It wasn’t fostered in me by her though, I have two older sisters who are both practical people but were very much more girly girls growing up. I wore a suit to my Uncle’s wedding when I was about 6. I vividly remember picking it out and being very proud of my waistcoat.

Throughout primary school I continued living to all extents and purposes as a boy. Until year 6 when my sister told me I should grow my hair so I didn’t get bullied in secondary school (something that had never been a problem for me, but had for her) so I wore my hair in bunchies after that.

Secondary school was a strange transition. I was still the same as ever but as puberty began to kick in it was no longer possible to fit in seamlessly as a boy, and nor did I find myself wanting to so much. I fostered closer friendships with girls and drifted gradually away from the group of boys I had been friends with since Reception. I began to wear skirts and to experiment with make-up.

Now as a 24 year old woman, I have reached a comfortable middle ground. I have gradually found what makes me comfortable and happy during my time travelling, studying and working. I now work in tech with a physics degree under my belt – not the standard female route but it’s nice to bring some variety into the sector! These days I rarely wear skirts or dresses as I find myself less comfortable in them – I don’t feel like myself in a dress. I wear make-up a few times a year for a special occasion, and I never wear high heels because I don’t see the point in being uncomfortable. Usually I just wear jeans and a jumper. Being more boyish has not held me back from finding partners – my longest relationship was 4 years. I am certainly not mainstream and to everybody’s taste – and nor would I want to be!

Fay

heey guys, i am a 17 year old girl from holland. most people accept me being a tomboy expect my sisters and mom. my mom says that girls are suppose to look pretty and look clean all the time and she doesn’t really accept me being a tomboy. same goes to my sisters they think it’s a phase and tell me that i will feel pretty if i ty girly things. they don’t listen to me at all! i love being a tomboy and don’t feel comfortable doing or wearing girly stuff. they think i want to be a boy but i don’t. they just don’t get that there are girls that like being girls but simply enjoy dressing/acting masculine. what should i do??

Anonymous

Ive always been different since i was little. I would dress different, act different. And etc. Ive always gotten along better with guys because alot of girls i knew were too much drama. Im also a pansexual, so i like it all. But, im finding out more these days that im liking women more and am attracted to them alot more. Maybe im sexually fluid? Anyway, im not hardcore tomboy, but im definitely no girly girl. Ive tried, and think about it still, or even just trying to be more feminine . But, thats not me, im different. I like unisex, and guy t shirts, jeans or sweats, and tennis shoes. I think im going to embrace and accept who i really, truely am, a tomboy.