Hi There, My daughter is 4 and insists she’s a boy. She loves all things boys and has never shown any interest in any ‘girly things’ as does her twin sister. I’ve explained to her that although she’s not a boy she is a tomboy. She wasn’t happy about not being a boy but she is happy about being a tomboy! So to all you tomboys out there – I need some advise! I worry about her… she told me last night that she thinks about being a boy while I sleep… Any advise would be appreciated.

5 thoughts on “Sue

  1. Hey Sue,
    From what you are saying it could be that your child is transgender. This is something you should keep in mind although it does not neccessarily have to be true. I am a tomboy myself and have also said quite often that i wanted to be a boy. I am 18 now and not transgender However there is a difference between saying you want to be a boy and saying you are a boy and refusing to be seen as anything else. The latter could mean the child in question is transgender while the former probably just means the child is a tomboy like me. Whatever your child may be remember she is a beautiful person and you should give her all the love and support you can.

  2. Sue, I really recommend researching transgendered people. Try to keep an open, supportive mind, okay? Your child may really need it.

  3. If she is that persistent about being a boy and just acting boyish but still being a girl is not enough for her then you have to consider that she is not a tomboy. She is most likely transgender which means she identifies as a boy on the inside. You could start calling her “he”/a boy name and if she reacts well to that and if she is comfortable with that and wants you to continue then you have to consider that she is probably trans. Doing research on trans people and raising trans children will help you understand. And if any point in her life when she’s older, she tells you she is actually a boy, you should respect her wishes and not judge her and try your hardest to understand what she is going through because coming out as trans to a non-educated parent is very hard for a child. Just love and respect her wether she stays your daughter or becomes your son. Give her time to figure herself out, she may not be trans she could just be a masculine girl, but be open and supportive to the possibility that she might be transgender. Thank you and best of luck to you both

  4. she could end up being transgendered, or its some cute phase, i used to call myself a boy when i was 3-4 same with my sister and my brother insisted that he was a girl (though that may have been my fault since i wanted a baby sister and constantly called him Sarah) but my advice is wait till she’s older she’s four and i know from personal experience that toddles have weird imaginations

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